AKA Communication

Family Life Coaching

No matter how old or wise we get, it can be hard to stay strong when difficulty comes knocking. Facing emotions or challenges that make us uncomfortable is never easy, but avoiding our problems only compounds our stress and anxiety and leads to further upset later on down the road.

What is avoidance coping?

Avoidance is a real problem and one with far-reaching consequences for our happiness and long-term wellbeing. If you want to avoid the perilous pitfalls of avoidance coping, you’ve got to learn how to face your problems head on — but that takes know-how and substantial amount of understanding.

Avoidance behaviours are basically a form of coping that requires us to change our behaviour in order to stop ourselves from thinking of or feeling things that make us feel uncomfortable. This type of coping is commonly referred to as avoidance coping, avoidant coping and even escape coping, encompassing a wide range of behaviours that are as toxic as they are varied.

In order to truly heal and recover from the traumas and hardships in our lives, we need to face them and deal with them open and honestly.

As humans we often engage in avoidant coping , and we do so in the belief that it will reduce the stress that challenging situations create. The problem, however, is that it’s only a temporary fix; a plaster on a serious wound . Avoiding the hard things only leads to more stress hardship no matter how you look at it. If you really want the discomfort to end, you have to turn and face the things that cause pain in your life.

Signs you’re avoiding the things you shouldn’t.

Avoiding tough conversation : making us more stressed and even impact our physical wellbeing. Avoiding the tough issues may impact on your Mental health,

Your relationships are suffering :Carrying around unresolved conflict actually compounds the stress in our lives and can cause us to lash out at colleagues and loved ones . These break downs in relationships can lead to us feeling more isolated and hopeless.

Avoiding tough talks and tough situations can negatively affect your physical health : Prolonged stress can dampen our immune systems, worsen skin conditions like psoriasis, eczema and acne, and even cause reproductive problems for women due to the hormonal side-effects. Unaddressed conflict can also lead to neck and back problem.

Why we avoid tackling issues in our lives : There are a few reasons we avoid the things and conversations that make us uncomfortable. Avoidance feels like it made worth while as we fell that the conversation make us feel is comfortable so we feel that it will be better to avoid the things that make us comfortable ; The first step to dealing with your avoidance issues is starts with understanding why we avoid it in the first place. Ask yourself and get to the bottom of why is not always as simple as you think.

You believe we have too much to lose : Believing we have too much to lose leads us to also believe that trading short-term discomfort for long-term dysfunction is a fair trade. This incorrect conclusion can undermines our wellbeing and overall happiness.

We hope that things will work out : When you put all your eggs into the basket of hopeful belief that life will just “work out” — you fall into a host of problems and pitfalls that make your life that much more difficult for the living.

We let our past experiences determine our future : The experiences of our past often shaping the coping mechanisms we use in the future. Many of us grew up in homes in which people dealt with problems poorly or resolved their issues through heated conflict that made it clear we weren’t safe to express ourselves.

We become passive-aggressive : With the use of social media we often Struggling to have hard conversations and may end up being passive-aggressive , we take on avoidance techniques that stem from the fear of confrontation .

You’re spending a lot of time concentrating on the problems of others : Your avoiding a frank conversation or issue yourself and are afraid to analyse your own thoughts and behaviours, we often zero in on the issues of others, offering them our assistance to the detriment of our own long term wellbeing.

You always change the subject :You to jump-to and change the topic before anyone can turn the conversation toward you and the insecurities and stress you’re dealing with.

You’re relying too much on numbing substances : Substance abuse is one of the most common ways we avoid stress and one of the most common ways we try to numb ourselves to the pain that’s occurring in our lives. Escaping reality though gin-and-tonics might seem like a tempting option but it only leads to a compound of stress and can mean you have learnt to numb yourself — rather than dealing with our problems .

You put everything off until “tomorrow” : When every other day becomes “tomorrow” — you have a problem with avoidance that needs to be dealt with this means that the issue is never resolved.

You have a lot of “friends” but no one supports you. You have a number of superficial friends but dont have many Real friends. When you have real friend your more than likely more likely to sit down and deal with disagreements and or encourage you to tackle them.

You Avoid situations and places, remove yourself from the situation “getaways” or “self-care” more than you should.

Arguing Style Test :This test is designed to evaluate the arguing style you use when you fight with the people you care about. Arguing is an indication of wanting to communicate something, usually something close to one's heart. While many issues can be resolved through peaceful discussion, other conflicts can provoke anger, defensiveness, resentment and other strong emotions. After finishing this test you will receive a FREE snapshot report with a summary evaluation and graph. You will then have the option to purchase the full results for $6.95

Top habits to adopt when you find yourself avoiding situation ?